Break Even
by HLP - Katon
Summary: Forcing yourself to be with someone else won't make you stop loving the person you truly do love. Just ask Puck and Rachel.
1. Eventually, We'll Be Together, or Not

**A/N – **Sadness will ensue. I promise. You probably will cry.

DISCLAIMER: I do not own GLEE.

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><p><strong>Break Even:<strong>

They'd known each other since they were in diapers; Lima does have a very small Jewish community, after all. They played together all the time when they were little; their parents were good friends. He'd been there when she won her first singing competition. She'd been there when his dad left. So, you see, ever since they were babies, Rachel Berry and Noah Puckerman have been in each others lives. Even when he was throwing slushies in her face in high school her and her fathers still went to their house every Sunday evening for dinner.

They both knew that they, eventually, would be together. For good.

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><p>That all changed when he found out Quinn was pregnant, with his baby. He couldn't handle that meaning nothing to him. Well, okay, not nothing. He had liked her a little; but he mostly slept with her that night because of Rachel. Why did she have to hang all over Finn like that? She'd been his since they were little; Finn wasn't allowed to have her. Only he ended up getting her, didn't he?<p>

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><p>When the true paternity of the baby came out, Rachel tried to act like it didn't bother her; in all actuality, she had been devastated. So, she told Finn. Not only did he deserve to know that Quinn was a lying, cheating bitch; but her Noah deserved to be there for that baby girl. She had always had her suspicions, but she always hoped they were wrong. Quinn had taken the one thing that was always supposed to be hers.<p>

After that, Rachel started skipping the Sunday dinners. She didn't want to have to see Quinn with Noah. She didn't want to have to see Sarah's confused glances between them. She didn't want to see the looks Mrs. Puckerman always gave her. She just couldn't handle it. She wishes it was her with that baby in her belly; not even her dreams of Broadway could make her stop wishing that. So, every Sunday when her dads left for the Puckerman's, Rachel sat in her room until they were gone, and then she'd stuff pillows under her shirt to see what she would look like pregnant.

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><p>Puck didn't like that Rachel started avoiding him; but what could he do? This had to happen for a reason, right? He was supposed to be with Quinn, and forget about Rachel. He needed to let her be happy with Finn. Only he couldn't. Rachel was (is) an important part of his life. He just wanted to apologize for everything he's done. He wouldn't take it back though, cause he does love his little girl. He just thinks, hopes, that one day he and Rachel will still be together.<p>

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><p>When the baby is born, Rachel can't bring herself to go to the hospital. She knows that baby will be beautiful, and she can't face the reality of the situation. So, instead she tells everyone else to go she'll stay and see what the judges say. Only as soon as they're done announcing the winners; she's not even sad they lose, she gets to the hospital as quickly as possible. When she arrives, most of New Directions is gone. Quinn and Puck being the only two left. She walks down the hallway toward the nursery, but stops short when she hears Quinn ask <em>that<em> question. The _'did you ever love me'_ question. She holds her breath as she waits for Puck's answer. When he does, she feels a little more of her heart break, (not that there is much left anyway), and she walks slowly out of the building.

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><p>He tells Quinn he loves her. He does too, but it's not the kind of love where you <em>love<em> love someone; it's the, you're the mother of my child, I'll always feel something for you, kind of love. So, really he's not lying. When Shelby comes to take away his baby, he's hurt. Very hurt. At the same time he can't help but think about how Rachel must be feeling. Her mom doesn't want her; she wants _his_ baby. So, he goes by her house, after he drops Quinn of at Mercedes' house. Her dads open the door, but tell him she isn't home. He just nods and walks away.

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><p>Rachel had gone back to hospital the day after she heard that conversation between Puck and Quinn. She had to see Beth before someone adopts her. When she lays her eyes on the little girl she feels the tears come to her eyes. She had been right, this little baby is gorgeous. It's here that she thinks that maybe she and Puck really don't have a chance to ever be together. So, when he comes to the door after her mother adopts his baby, she makes her fathers tell him she's not home. She can't stand in his way anymore.<p>

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><p>When he comes back from juvie none of the kids in Glee blamed him; they figured it was just him acting out after losing Beth. Honestly, that wasn't all of it. It was also the fact that Rachel <em>still<em> wouldn't, (couldn't), look at him. She pretends they're okay, and she's started coming to Sunday dinners again, but every time she has to talk to him, she focuses her eyes above his, on his forehead. It hurts that someone who has always been there isn't now. He thinks it kind of feels like losing his dad all over again, only worse. He doesn't understand how she can be fine with all of this. Only deep down he knows she's not, he sees the pain in her eyes every time he manages to catch them.

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><p>She doesn't love Finn. No matter how hard she tries. She thinks that if she tells herself, and everyone else, that she does maybe she'll start to believe it, as well. She still hasn't. Either way, she throws herself into that relationship, if only to take her mind off of Puck. They break up and get back together more times than she can count, and every time she acts sad. She's really not.<p>

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><p>In senior year when he and Quinn get back together, he loses Rachel all together. This is the first time he doubts them getting together in the future. He notices that she's spending all her time with Finn, and he's trying to make himself love Quinn. They still haven't been the same since sophomore year, and he didn't think they could get that back. So, he pushes himself into this relationship with Quinn.<p>

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><p>Rachel is still forcing this thing with Finn, and when Quinn and Puck are together it makes it so much harder. She has to hold herself together all the time and she hates it. When graduation comes, and she's supposed to break up with Finn, just like she told him, she doesn't. They talk about it and decide that maybe they can do the long distance thing. She only knows she can do it because she isn't really invested in this relationship. She has come to the conclusion that Puck and her will never be. It just isn't in the cards for them. It can't even break her heart anymore, she has nothing left of that.<p>

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><p>Puck watches her on graduation day. He watches as she kisses Finn after he gets his diploma, he watches when she hugs her dads then his mom, he watches her walk slowly toward him. She hugs him tightly to her, and he can't help but hug her back, she whispers a soft 'congratulations, I'm <em>so<em> proud of you', and she's gone again. He feels his eyes burn when he realizes that she's resigned to the fact that they'll never be together.

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><p>She still goes to New York and gets her Tony, but after she's done all that, she comes back to Lima. Not just for Finn, but because she's missed it herself. She doesn't expect to see a wedding being planned. When she gets to Finns little apartment she asks who's getting married, and doesn't expect the answer she receives. She smiles anyway and then proceeds to have sex with him. Later he tells her that he and Puck have become friends again, and Quinn is cool too, and they can't wait to see her. She pretends to be happy to see them when they walk into the bar, but really all she can do is stare at the ring on Quinn's finger.<p>

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><p>When Finn tells him that Rachel is coming home, he wonders what she's going to say when she finds out. He tells Finn that it's great and Quinn asks if they can meet at the bar in town. Of course Finn agrees, and Puck just sits there with a forced smile on his face. No one notices anyway. So, even though he knew she was coming, he can't help but be surprised to actually see her. She looks amazing, she's got this little red dress on, and it hugs her in all the right places, and these sexy as all fuck heels on, and her hair is falling down her back and framing her face, and… <em>God<em>, he still loves her. He notices, right away, how her eyes are drawn to the ring on Quinn's hand, and all he wants to do is take it off of her. Her and Quinn start talking about all the plans they have for the wedding so far, and Rachel ends up invited, he figured she'd be Finn's 'plus one' anyway. He can see the hurt, anger, regret, and sadness in her eyes. He thinks it's probably in his too. When she looks at him though, he also sees the love that's still there, and once again he fucking _hates _himself. Not for loving her, but for who he was in sophomore year, when he screwed it all up. After everyone is caught up, and they're all leaving, she hugs him tightly again, but doesn't say anything this time, he feels her tears through his shirt. When she pulls away there isn't anything there, though.

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><p>Now sitting in the wedding, that was being held in a <em>Catholic<em> church, in the middle of Santana, (who still hates Quinn, but Puck is her boy), and Mrs. Puckerman, she could feel her eyes well with tears, and the thing hasn't even started yet. Mrs. Puckerman leans toward Rachel and whispers that this should be a Jewish gathering, and that he should be waiting for her, not Quinn; and Rachel almost breaks. Obviously, Santana heard what was said, as she looks at Rachel and nods her head in agreement. When she hears the wedding march start she keeps her eyes forward, on Puck. That's the same spot she keeps her eyes through the entire ceremony, Santana grabs her hand in the middle of the vows, and gives her a meaningful look when the priest asks if anyone would like to object. She just sits there. When he kisses his bride, she stands, scoots past a few people, and sneaks out an emergency exit. Later that same day Finn asks her to marry him. She says no. Just because she doesn't get to have Noah doesn't mean she wants to be with someone else. So, she leaves their apartment, and shows up on Santana's door at one in the morning. She collapses into sobs for the first time that day, and Santana holds her and whispers that everything will be okay, until she cries herself to sleep. Just like she told herself in sophomore year, she won't stand in his way of happiness. She'll back off and suffer in silence. Or, well, with Santana by her side.

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><p>Puck notices her leave the church before the wedding is over. He knew from the beginning she would. He's actually surprised she lasted this long. Him and Quinn decided against a honey moon. His phone ringing at one thirty in the morning makes him wish they would have gone on one. He groggily answers and then Finn is telling him that he proposed, and suddenly he's wide awake, then Finn is blubbering like a baby about her saying no. Puck can't stop the grin from forming on his face, but then frowns and looks down at his sleeping <em>wife<em>. It's too late. So, he talks Finn through everything, and in the middle of a sentence his phone beeps with an incoming call. He tells Finn to hold on, and switches lines. Before he can get the word hello out of his mouth, someone is yelling at him. In Spanish. Then English. Santana is telling him he's an asshole and he's a bastard, and he'll be sorry for ever hurting her. He already is. Then she's talking about how she showed up at her house at one o'clock crying, not because she broke up with Finn, but because he married Quinn. He feels even worse now. He gets hung up on when she tells him that she's on Rachel's side, and he doesn't expect to see either of them for a while. He walks out of his bedroom and down the small hallway, he's closed his phone and not gone back to talking to Finn, sits down on his couch and sobs into his hands, it's the first time he's _actually_ cried since his dad left. All he wants is another chance. He just wants to be with Rachel, and now he's too late. She said no, he realizes now, he could have too. He didn't have to take the cowards way out, he didn't have to stay with Quinn, yeah, they had a baby, at _sixteen_, they didn't love one another. He just made himself think he did, to take his mind off of Rachel, it didn't work. Now, he's stuck. Thinking about this makes him cry harder, he hates himself for fucking things up again. He could have walked away. But, he didn't.

_Now they really had no chance. And it's all his fault._

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><p><strong>AN – **I made myself cry. So, this may stay a one shot, but if you all like it enough, I may make it a multi-chapter. Just let me know.

Seriously, though, I cried. At a lot of this story.

Hope you enjoyed as much as you could with it being so sad.

Reviews would be appreciated.

- Katie.


	2. Authors Note

**A/N – **Okay, you probably thought this was another chapter; sadly it's not. But, I _am_ making this into a multi-chapter story. So, no worries there. (:

BTW: thank you for all of your reviews. That's why I'm making it more than just a oneshot. I'm sorry I made you cry! I made myself cry too, so I hope that helps a little.

Any ideas you guys have would be wonderful, because I'm kind of stuck right now. I mean, I have a general idea of what I want to happen from here; but I wanna get all of your input, right now, because I'm still planning out my story line, and I want a better idea before I post a new chapter.

Generally speaking though, I would prefer to, not drag out, but make it so that Puck doesn't just right away leave Quinn. I want to delve a little deeper into Santana and Rachel's recently formed relationship. I want Rachel to start questioning certain things. I want Puck to question certain things. Buh, I don't want to give away everything right now. I'm just trying to give you something to think about, so when you give me your ideas you can help me lead up to things and such. I mean I'm still undecided about a lot of things, but hopefully I'll have chapter two up by Monday or Tuesday. Maybe before then, I'm not sure.

I was actually really proud of chapter one, and I don't want to ruin it with the second chapter not being on the same level. So, the updates on this story may be a little slower than the ones for my other stories; it's only because I want to be _really_, really proud of how this entire story goes. I will keep up with it though, I promise.

Don't forget, any and all ideas will be considered, probably for quite a while, I'm weird about people not taking suggestions and actually thinking of everything that could happen if they used said suggestion. Please send me your suggestion in a PM, I'll probably get to those before reviews, so it'd be better to send them that way and not as a review. That way the suggestion can be between us, especially incase I use it. I like to surprise you guys.

Oh, before I forget to say it, you're all wonderful. I love your reviews, they really brighten my entire day. (:

Sorry for rambling.

Love,

Katie.


	3. Moving On is Harder Than It Seems

**A/N – **I just want to thank all of you for your ideas, reviews, and alerts! (: I definitely wasn't expecting anything like that. So, Thank You!

DISCLAIMER: I do not own GLEE.

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><p><strong>Chapter Two:<strong>

Puck expects to be avoided like the plague by Rachel and Santana. Surprisingly, they meet him and Quinn for dinner a couple days after the wedding. The one that _is_ actually avoiding him is his mother. For goodness sakes the woman has been bothering him for _forever_ to settle down, and now that he has, she _avoids_ him? Fucking _for real_? Well, whatever, he'll deal with her later. Right now, he's trying not to notice Santana's death glares.

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><p>The <em>only<em> reason Rachel agrees to this dinner is because Santana told her that acting like it didn't faze her was going to be a _'fucking awesome'_ way to get back at Puck. Not that she wanted to get back at him; she just wants him to think she's fine. So, when Quinn asks if she and Santana would join them for dinner, she accepts. Sitting at the table across from him, isn't what it used to be. She used to be _happy_ when she sat across from him. Now she just wants to leave his presence. Conversation between Quinn, Santana and her is coming easily; Puck sits with his mouth shut. She catches Santana's eye at one point, and the look on the Latinas face is telling her to keep her cool, they can leave soon. So, she keeps her tone light and airy; and she avoids Puck's eyes.

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><p>A couple days later he's <em>pissed<em> at his mother. So, you know, he shows up where she works, unexpectedly. She, of course, knows right away that he's come to cause a scene; and pulls him outside. He screams at her, she screams back, he screams again, and finally the truth comes out. The softly spoken words are still ringing in his ears, 'I just can't believe you went through with it. What about Rachel, Noah? What about the things you guys have had planned since you used to play house, when you were _five_?' He hadn't said anything back, and, honestly, he doesn't think she expected him to. So, they both walked opposite directions from one another. That's how he finds himself knocking on Santana's door two hours after that.

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><p>When Rachel opens the front door to her and Santana's small house, that they now share, she sure as <em>hell<em> is not expecting him to be standing there. She's gotta get on her game face, and she's gotta do it fast. Slowly she steps outside and pulls the door shut behind her. He can't know she was eating _ice cream_ and watching _Fight Club_, his favorite movie, before he arrived. When she asks what he's doing there, he just stares at her for a minute. Then he asks if she remembers when they used to play house. She closes her eyes against the tears that she can feel filling them, and she whispers a soft 'yes'.

"What happened," are the next words out of his mouth. She reopens her eyes, and she notices the honest confusion on his face.

"High school," she says with a shrug. She's not ready to have this conversation; maybe one day they would have it, but not right now. "Santana will be home shortly, and it's my turn to cook tonight, so," she trails off watching him nod.

"That's cool. I should get home," she watches him walk down the front steps, back across the lawn, and then as he gets into his truck. She knows that he knows she was lying about having to cook. She watches until he turns the corner, then she turns and heads back into the house to finish her ice cream and movie. It makes her feel even worse.

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><p>Puck is cleaning out his, and <em>Quinn's<em>, he reminds himself mentally, garage the next day, when Finn pulls up. Puck wonders if he forgot about a day of video games or something, his question is answered when Finn says that Rachel is getting the rest of her _shit_ out of his house. Finn is in that really pissed off stage after a break up, so he doesn't really mean it; but Puck still has to hold himself back from punching the guy out. Instead he just nods his head. Finn starts going through a box, one he knows is Puck's, and he holds up a picture, as if asking what had been going on in it. Puck can't help the smile that covers his face.

"Cupcake fight, dude," he says. Finn gets a funny look on his face as he studies the picture.

"Is that _Rachel_," he sounds completely confused now.

"Yes, Finn, it is. We used to be really close. You know, when we were little," he tries to explain it down to them only being close _then_, as _children_.

"Oh, okay," thank God Finn is still not the brightest crayon in the box. Puck takes the box out of Finn's hand and snatches the picture back and puts them both under his tool bench. Those were _their_ memories. They were _special_, or some shit like that.

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><p>When Rachel goes to get the remainder of her things from Finn's apartment with Santana, it doesn't take nearly as long as she thought it would. Maybe that's because of Santana though; she figures if she hadn't come, Finn would be trying to talk her into staying. He leaves as soon as they get there, and she can't help but be thankful for that. As they pack Santana asks her why she said no if Puck is married to Quinn. Rachel doesn't even pause as she says, 'just because he did something stupid doesn't mean I want to do the same stupid thing. I don't love Finn, I love Puck. Marrying Finn isn't going to change that, and I'm done pretending it will'. Santana seems to accept her words right away, they make sense after all. She also seems surprised that Rachel called him Puck. He's always been Noah. Even after the wedding. This is the first time he's been Puck, and Santana knows it's her defense mechanism.<p>

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><p>While he's working, Puck is thinking about what Quinn said this morning at breakfast. She asked him if he ever wanted to have anymore kids, he'd choked on his cereal, and then an, 'I don't know' spilled from his lips. She'd asked him to think about it because, 'I really want a few, and I think we'd be good parents'. That wasn't what she'd said when they were younger. He <em>wants<em> kids. Of course he does. He just isn't sure he wants kids with _her. _He still dreams about his kids having brown hair, hazel eyes, kick ass little singing voices, and Rachel's nose. He loves that nose. When she walks into the shop to have something on her car fixed he knows his mind is made up about kids.

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><p>When Rachel gets home a couple days later she sees Santana talking frantically into the phone. She hangs up as soon as her eyes land on Rachel, and Rachel asks her what's going on. Santana isn't one to beat around the bush, so Rachel knows she won't right now. What she says makes Rachel wish she could take back the last five minutes; because the words <em>'Puck and Quinn are talking about having kids'<em> are a few words Rachel never expected to come out of her mouth. She puts on her brave face and says that it's wonderful that they're considering it. She then proceeds to make Santana pick up her car when she gets the call that it's ready.

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><p>Puck tells Quinn he isn't ready to have kids yet. They fight, because, apparently, she wants one before their first year of marriage is over; and Puck knows he still won't be ready. He doesn't think he'll ever be ready. Not with her. He really flips his lid when she says that all their <em>friends<em> think it's a good idea. Then he's yelling because she told their _fucking friends_? Who does that shit without telling their husband or wife? He still has trouble thinking of her as that. It's safe to say, he sleeps in the guest room that night.

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><p>Rachel sees Mrs. Puckerman in the store about a month after finding out that Puck might be having another baby. Mrs. Puckerman asks how Rachel is doing, and Rachel tells her all about <em>Tyler<em>. Who she's been seeing for a couple weeks now. He's sweet, he opens her door for her, he's _never _late, apparently he's just wonderful. She tries, and fails, to ignore the voice in her head that tells her that 'he's not that _badass, Jewish_ man that she really wants'. Mrs. Puckerman tells her she's very happy for her to be finding happiness. Rachel sees the sadness in her eyes though. She tells Tyler they can't see each other anymore that night; she's already had a relationship trying to hide her feelings for someone else, she's not doing it again. It will only end in disaster anyway.

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><p>Puck wonders if him and Quinn ever actually talked to each other. They hardly say two words to each other, ever. Sometimes, he catches himself thinking about what it would be like if they did have kids together. Would she talk to their kids? Would she be nice to them? He didn't know. His mom isn't ignoring him anymore which is nice. Until she tells him about this Tyler <em>douche<em> Rachel is seeing. Why is she seeing someone? Oh, right, because he's _married_. Fuck his life.

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><p>Rachel is very excited when she gets home from job hunting. She gets to teach little girls ballet! Now, she can help other little girls reach their dreams. She only comes down from her high when she sees Santana looking very put out as she sits on their couch, staring at nothing. Taking the seat next to her, Rachel asks what is bothering her. Santana tells her that, '<em>Brittany called, said she's coming back to Lima. Rach, I haven't seen her in <em>years_, I've finally started to move on, why won't she let me,'_ Rachel doesn't think she really wants an answer but she offers one anyway.

"San, maybe she's coming back because she knows you two deserve a second chance. Maybe when she gets back you guys can have your happily ever after. Maybe… Maybe you're not supposed to move on," she silently starts to wonder, maybe she isn't supposed to move on either? No, she thinks to herself, I can't be in the way again.

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><p>It's been two months since he's seen Rachel last. He doesn't know why he's keeping track; it isn't like they ever talk or anything. They hardly even look at each other. Still, though, he just wants to <em>see<em> her. His wish comes true when he walks into his house; she's sitting there, looking beautiful as ever, talking to Quinn and Kurt, who's home from New York for a couple days. She isn't wearing anything spectacular, jean shorts and a flowly tank top, but still, he can't take his eyes off of her; and for a moment, he stands in the doorway, just looking at her. He glances at Quinn, who's watching him, back at Rachel, who's avoiding his eyes, and says he's going to take a shower. He hears the conversation re-start as he walks away. The last thing he hears is something about how she and Tyler are no longer together. He smiles.

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><p>She decides it could be time to hash out everything that went wrong between them. In order for them to be comfortable around one another, they need to talk. She decides this when she tells Santana to do just that with Brittany; to which Santana replies that it's time to take her own advice. So Rachel is going to talk to Puck. Tomorrow. While he's on his break at work, she's got her mind made up. Brittany is coming to their house tomorrow as well, so she and Santana can have their dirty little heart to hearts at the same time. Later on they will probably be upset about it, at the same time.<p>

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><p>To say he's shocked when she walks in, when he's about to go on break, and tells him they need to talk, is an understatement. Still, he just nods and leads her outside. No one needs to be involved in this but them. He watches her chew on her bottom lip for a couple minutes, then asks, 'where do we start'? She looks up and says, 'from the beginning'.<p>

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><p><strong>Chapter Two.<strong>

**A/N – **Hmm, I don't about this, guys. I really want to be proud of this story when it's finished, so I'm hoping you'll like this chapter as much as the first one.

What Rachel meant by from the beginning is literally from the beginning. When they were little. She wants to go back and talk about _everything_. – That was just in case you didn't get what my last line meant.

Thank you for reading, I really appreciate it.

Don't forget: send me some suggestions. I'm lucky I got this out of my head.

- Katie.


	4. Conversations Not Ready to Be Had

**A/N – **I'm so sorry about this taking so long to update! School's just started and everything is a little crazy for me right now. I'm doing the best I can though.

DISCLAIMER: I do not own GLEE, there would be no Quinn in the way of my Puckleberry happiness.

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><p><strong>Chapter Three:<strong>

'From the beginning' is not what Puck thinks it's supposed to be. He figures they'll start from when they were little kids; so when Rachel starts at the beginning of high school, Puck is a little more than upset. Rachel must notice, for she stops talking to give him a questioning look.

"I figured you meant we were going to discuss _everything_ in this 'from the beginning' talk," he says. Rachel nods slowly.

"Yes, well, we will, eventually. Right now I don't think you have time to do that though. You only have a fifteen minute break, and I have to be at work soon," she cuts herself off, knowing exactly what's coming next.

"Then let's meet after we're both out of work. We can go somewhere or something," he doesn't really know where this comes from, but the words come out anyway.

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><p>All Rachel thinks about at work that day is why she agreed to meet him later. They need to talk, she knows that. She's just not entirely sure she's <em>ready<em> to talk yet. So, she's a little bit distracted, yes; she becomes even more so when she notices the tan muscular man in question enter the studio. Twenty minutes later he's still watching her with that infuriatingly handsome smirk on his face while she ends her last class for the day. Now all she has to do is get through their talk in one piece. Probably easier said than done…

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><p>They sit at a small diner, where his sister is currently working, and trying to eavesdrop, and at first it's silent. Puck tries to think of something he can say, but honestly, he doesn't know what he needs to. He almost says <em>something <em>to break the silence, when she starts talking.

"Do you ever think that maybe this was supposed to happen," she wonders watching him for any signs of anger.

"What? Us not being together? I mean I figured we'd grow out of it, but I guess that didn't happen," he says. He really doesn't get where she's going with this.

"Maybe we weren't ever really supposed to be together. Maybe we just thought we were because of what our parents, and the people at temple, used to say about, and to, us. Maybe it was never supposed to be you and I, in the end," Rachel says, continuously looking for signs of anger. He doesn't show it if he's feeling it though.

"So, that's it then? That's how you're going to make this end, with it being one big lie between us," he's starting to get more and more angry by the minute.

"No, not a lie-," he cuts her off.

"Then what the fuck would it be, Rachel," he's not only angry now, he's really trying not to cry.

"It would be a misunderstanding. Something that everyone really did expect to happen, but it just didn't. That's not a lie," she really wants him to understand.

"Misunderstanding my ass. You're just trying to make yourself feel better about all this. Well, guess what, it's not gonna happen. I'm not gonna feel better about this, and neither are you. Nothing either of us does will change that. I'll admit it, I fucked up. You did what I should have and walked away," he pauses at the sight of her eyes welling with tears, takes a deep breath, and goes on. "I didn't though, Rach, and I regret it every time I walk through my door and it's Quinn in my kitchen, or my bedroom, or anywhere and not _you_," he finishes in this quiet, almost shy, voice and it breaks her heart a little bit.

"Noah, what did you do to Rachel," his sister is back, and screaming at him.

"No, Sarah, it's okay. He didn't do anything, it was just the conversation in general," Rachel says as she stands. "Noah, I… I'm sorry, I wasn't ready for this conversation," she watches him for a moment, before turning away, and leaving the diner.

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><p>When she walks through her door five minutes later, she finds Santana and Brittany curled up on the couch, sleeping. As she grabs the throw blanket off the back, she can't help but think that 'at least something good came out of their talks'. After making sure they were both covered well enough, she walks toward her bedroom. She frowns when she sees the scrapbook she made years ago. Tonight, she just can't bring herself to look at those pictures. She decides then and there that within the next week, her and Noah will finish having their conversation. She just isn't sure what time this week.<p>

* * *

><p>It's been three days since he poured his <em>fucking<em> heart out to Rachel, and he hasn't seen her since she left him at the diner. He's been moping around lately and Quinn is starting to take notice. He doesn't really mind that she knows something is bothering him; what bothers him is that she keeps trying to make him _talk_ about it. Like, really, when was the last time he shared his feeling with_ anyone_? Besides Rachel. Sighing, he stands up from working on this woman's car, and sees Santana standing at the front desk. He sighs and thinks he's in for it.

"Puckerman, come here, I gotta talk to you," slowly, he walks toward her. "Look, I know you didn't do anything wrong, but Rachel's all mopey, and I want you to talk to her. I was hoping shit between you two would be well on your way to the bedroom after you talked, but all she wants to do now, is sit in her bedroom," he shakes his head.

"San, I can't go talk to her again. I tried, I told her what I was feeling, and I don't do that, and she left. She _left_, San. I can't go through that feeling again. I can't watch her walk away again."  
>Puck, listen to me. She needed some time to process what you said; I think she's had enough. Please try. I can't stand seeing her like this anymore. Britts and I will get outta the house tonight. Try to talk to her, we'll be back around midnight," without waiting for his response, she's walking away. He's left thinking about trying to talk to Rachel again, and the fact the Brittany's back…<p>

* * *

><p>He shows up at her house at about seven. True to her word, Santana's car is nowhere in sight. He knocks lightly on the door, hears a faint 'coming' and waits for her to open the door.<p>

"Noah," she breathes out when she sees him.

"Look, we need to talk about this Rachel. For _me_ to be the one trying to talk about something, it has to be serious. Now, let me in, and we're going to do this," she doesn't even fight him, just moves aside and lets him in.

"I shouldn't have run out before, I apologize," she says, looking down at her feet.

"'s fine. You needed time I get it. I've given you some now, and I really wanna finish this," he notices her sharp intake of breath, and realizes what he said. "Not us, I wanna finish the talk."

"Okay," she nods, "we can try."

Two hours later, they're sitting on her couch, she's got a tissue in one hand, and his hand in the other. He can't help the little smile that's on his face.

"Noah, all I want is to be with you," he looks at her, shocked, "I just can't make you leave Quinn. I don't wanna be the homewrecker. But, I love you," she frowns to herself, and still can't look at him.

"Rach," he says softly, "baby, I love you, too. It doesn't matter what I've done to try not to, I just can't stop."

She looks up at him now, tears streaming down her cheeks, but a small smile on her face, as well.

Puck wipes the tears from her face, leans toward her, and presses his lips to hers, for the first time in a _really_ long time.

Neither of the hears the click of the door opening and closing.

**Chapter Three.**

* * *

><p><strong>AN – **Uh oh. I feel bad, cause I don't know if this chapter is good enough. This is what I've got though, so….

Hopefully you enjoyed!

Love,

Katie!


	5. HBIC is Back

**A/N – **It's been so long. You're going to have to expect that for a while though! I'm really trying, but with school and everything... It'll just take a little longer.

DISCLAIMER: I do not own GLEE.

**Chapter Four:**

* * *

><p>It's probably a good thing they heard Santana before they got into the room. Neither Rachel or Puck are happy to have to break their kiss, but had they not heard Santana, Puck would be getting reamed out by a <em>very<em> angry Quinn right about now.

Santana can tell, just by the way Rachel is blushing, that something happened between the two of them, but she'll wait until later to have that conversation. As she glances over at Quinn it looks like she might be getting a clue about them as well.

"What's going on here," Quinn asks, her voice about an octave higher than usual.

"Nothing, I was just..." Puck trails off not knowing what to say.

"He was over here helping me out. I was telling him about this date I went on the other day, but I didn't wanna call San, cause she was with Britt and all, and I wasn't sure if you'd be busy. So, I called Noah and asked him to come over after he was through with work," Rachel explained hastily.

"So, why are you blushing," Quinn questioned, she was not gonna let this go easily.

"I'm talking about my date. With Noah Puckerman, of all people. He likes to make inappropriate comments about my sex life," she knows the look Puck is giving her right now says that she's still an amazing actress, but she can't bring herself to look at him right now. She just made out with her friends husband.

"Alright, I guess," Quinn starts, "I know he makes everything awkward. Sorry about that. You really could've called me though, I was bored until San and Britt came and got me."

"Well, I didn't want to interrupt anything, so it was easier this way," Rachel lies easily with a smile on her face.

A few minutes has Rachel sitting and laughing with the girls, only stealing a few glances in Puck's direction, as he sits with a bored expression on his face. When Quinn grins and says she must get her 'poor baby' home, Puck sees the look of sadness cross Rachel's face before she covers it with a chuckle. In that moment she feel her heart break all over again; he's not hers.

* * *

><p>Puck walks in his front door and the only thing he notices is that it's missing the smell of strawberries. All he smells is the flowery scent of Quinn. It hurts him more than it should. Quinn is his <em>wife. <em>He just can't help hoping this is all a bad dream.

* * *

><p>Rachel goes to bed early that night thinking about the conversation she, Brittany, and Santana had just had.<p>

_"Rach," Brittany starts, "are you alright?"_

"_Yeah, I'm good, Britt. I'm glad you're back," Rachel answers quietly._

"_Bull shit, Ray. I saw that blush and the way you were all flushed. Don't think that just because Quinn didn't see through you, I didn't. Because I definitely did," Santana said to her matter of factly. _

"_San, it was nothing. It was just something that should not have happened." Rachel says with a soft sigh. _

"_Rachel Barbra Berry, do not say that. Things don't just happen. Everything has a reason behind it. I saw the way he kept stealing little glances at you, the way his eyes softened every time you spoke. Rachel, he loves you, with all his heart, and nothing, not even a _wife_ will change that." Brittany was then looked at in shock. _

Needless to say, Rachel doesn't get much sleep that night.

* * *

><p>Puck kind of wishes that Quinn would have realized the way he was looking at Rachel. Maybe that would have given him away, but at least he wouldn't be hiding such a big secret anymore. He knows he can't feel bad for himself because he's the one who put them in this situation, marrying Quinn, he realizes, was the worst thing he could have done. He doesn't sleep much that night either.<p>

* * *

><p>It's been about two weeks since the night Puck cheated on Quinn. He still feels like shit for doing it, he's <em>not<em> a cheater, but at the same time, he wouldn't take it back for anything. He hasn't seen Rachel since that night either, and that makes him feel worse than the guilt.

* * *

><p>Rachel has been freaking out. Every time she sees Quinn she feels like the girl <em>knows.<em> I mean nothing Quinn does actually scream that, but she just can't help thinking it. She realizes it's the guilt making her think that way, and it makes it harder and harder to continue to lie. She's very aware of the fact that dinner at the Puckerman's will be awkward, really, probably, only for her.

* * *

><p>Quinn isn't a stupid woman. She sees the longing looks her husband gives one of her dear friends. Now, she's definitely pretending not to see them, because, you know, he's committed himself to <em>her<em>. That doesn't really make her feel one hundred percent better though. So, she decided to invite the girls, Rachel, San, and Britt, over for dinner. That's not to say she doesn't know what she's doing though. She may not be the HBIC she used to be, but she still knows how to make Rachel squirm.

* * *

><p>She's nervous. Not that she has anything to be nervous about, she just is. She can't decide what to wear, until Santana throws and pair of shorts and a flowy tank top at her. At that point she knows the night will just go downhill.<p>

* * *

><p>She goes of course. What kind of friend would she be if she didn't? Puck answers the door with a smile on his face, that makes Rachel's heart beat faster, he let's them in. Quinn looks beautiful in her summer dress, as per usual, and Rachel tells her so.<p>

"Thank you," Quinn says with a soft smile. "You look wonderful, yourself."

"Do I have to be jealous here, guys," Puck asks with a grin. Rachel frowns. Quinn giggles and kisses his cheek.

"What are we chopped liver," Santana asks, joining the banter, playfully.

"Of course not! You both look amazing," everyone laughs then. They're all dressed so casually.

* * *

><p>As they sit down for dinner, Quinn notices the way Puck seats himself next to Rachel, she starts a conversation. One she knows will upset Rachel.<p>

"So, Puck and I have been discussing children again," she says casually.

"Really? That's wonderful," always the amazing actress.

"Yeah, I've been thinking about wanting quite a few. He isn't sure how many he wants yet, but we plan on getting started very, very soon," she says grinning. Rachel swallows thickly. She should've known.

"That's great. Please pass the butter," Rachel smiles at Britt's obvious change in subject.

After that conversation, Rachel is very quiet the rest of the night. When they say their goodbyes she avoids Puck's hug. She can't handle this any longer. She needs to move on and she knows it. He won't leave Quinn, if them talking babies is any indication, he never even thought about it.

* * *

><p>She doesn't let herself cry until she's alone in her room.<p>

* * *

><p>He yells at Quinn. They haven't spoken about kids since he told her he wasn't sure he wanted any. He did, of course. Just not with her. He doesn't know how to leave her though. She'll make his life, and Rachel's, hell. He wants to do it though.<p>

He leaves and doesn't come home that night.

* * *

><p><strong>Chapter Four.<strong>

**A/N – **This chapter may get changed later. I'm not very happy with it. Anyway R&R please.

Love,

Katie.


	6. Speak Your Mind, Girl

**A/N - **It's been a long time since I've updated, and I apologize for that. I'm working on the next chapter as we speak, but I had to fix a couple things in this one first.

DISCLAIMER: I do not own GLEE.

**Speak Your Mind, Girl:**

The next morning Quinn is still really pissed off about what happened. Puck can't just _leave_ like that. It's not right. Maybe they were fighting, okay, but when you're married you're supposed to talk things out right? That's how it works. On top of that, no one walks away from Quinn Fabray. Well, Puckerman. Whatever. She'll find a way to fix this.

* * *

><p>He spends the night at Finn's. No real explanation, just a quick 'Quinn's being a bitch,' and everything is settled.<p>

It's about 10:30 in the morning before he decides he should head home. He has to work later anyway. Sighing, he calls out a goodbye to Finn and heads out the door.

* * *

><p>Rachel has had a horrible night. Like, really, this is probably the worst one so far. Worse than the night after she sat through their wedding. She did nothing but toss and turn all night, so in the morning she has bags under her eyes, and they're still bloodshot. It is not going to be a good day for her. Dammit.<p>

* * *

><p>Quinn is sitting at the kitchen table when he gets home, he thought she'd be at work by now, and just basically demands he 'have a seat'. He does, only because he doesn't want to start shit, even if he knows it's about to get started anyway.<p>

"Where have you been all night, Puck?" Quinn sounds mad, so Puck knows to tread lightly.

"I've been at Finn's. I can't deal with this right now, Quinn, I've gotta get ready for work," he says standing slowly. At her glare he almost backs down, but continues on with what he has to say, "you were a real bitch last night. I'm not letting you say we've been talking about having kids, because we sure as hell haven't. I don't want kids right now," _or ever with you_, he adds in his head, "and there isn't anything you can do to change my mind," and then he's marching down the hall, Quinn hot on his heels.

She can basically feel the steam coming out of her ears as she follows him down the hall, "Why don't you want kids Puck? You love kids! Or is this so that you can keep holding onto the hope that Rachel will never move on?" He freezes outside the bathroom door, and she grins smugly at his back, "that's right. I _know. _I know you love her, or at least you think you do. You think you're so sneaky, huh? With all your little longing looks I don't see why you'd think that way. I still don't even understand your infatuation with her, I mean she's the same as she was in high school. A loser."

Puck spins around to face her so fast Quinn is sure her head is what's spinning, "you can say whatever the _fuck_ you want about me, Quinn, but if you start talking shit about Rachel this is gonna get ugly real fast. And I promise, _I fucking promise_, that you will not win that fight. Back the fuck off of Rachel she didn't do jack shit to you," his glare is so strong she feels the need to take a step back, "oh, and by the way, the only loser I see is you. Rachel made it outta Lima, she won her Tony's she did what she wanted. You stayed here Quinn," and then the door is slammed in her face.

* * *

><p>Rachel ventures out of her room and into the kitchen for breakfast, where Brittany and Santana are having a pancake mix fight, and she smiles softly and just watches, lost in thought.<p>

"_Santana," high school senior, Rachel Berry, calls, "can I talk to you for a minute, please?" Santana sighs but closes her locker and turns to face the smaller brunette._

"_Sure, Berry, what's on your mind?"_

_Rachel isn't quite sure if this is Santana being nice, or just tolerating her, "it's our senior year, Santana, can't we try being friends this year? I mean I know we've had a horrible past, but I'm sorry for the rude, or disrespectful, things I've said to you in the past, and I know that we could be really great friends," Santana is actually kind of shocked that Rachel can talk so fast and without taking a breath. But whatever._

_Santana sighs, "I'm sorry too, Rachel, and you know it's gonna be hard for me, 'cause I'm kinda a bitch to everyone but Britt. You just gotta understand that."_

_Rachel nods, "I know. But I'm glad we're going to try."_

"Rach?" Rachel lightly swats Santana's hand away, "damn, I've been calling you for like five minutes."

Rachel sighs, "I was just thinking about the day we became friends. Sorry for reminiscing," she grins.

"Best thing I ever did, Rach," Santana smiles softly, and then offers her some of those 'vegan pancakes that are so fucking good'.

Even if they hadn't become friends then, Rachel can't see her best friend being anyone but her; and, honestly, Rachel is so glad she let Brittany back into her life. Sure, they'd both been worried, but now, none of those worries seem to matter.

* * *

><p>Had his secret glances at Rachel really been that obvious? He isn't quite sure. He honestly didn't think they were, but apparently Quinn Fabray doesn't miss a thing.<p>

Puck sighs as he rinses the soap off of himself and steps out of the shower, he really has no fucking idea what to do here. On one hand, Rachel has been his everything for as long as he can remember, she was there through everything; his father leaving, Beth, even if she wasn't speaking to him at the time, and now his marriage to Quinn? How can she put up with it all? On the other hand, Quinn is his wife now. The mother of his first child, but he knows, _he knows,_ that if he stays with her, he will never have anymore children. Shaking his head to rid himself of those thoughts, he pushes out of the bathroom, and silently thanks Jew God that Quinn has left.

* * *

><p>She's getting ready for work when the doorbell rings, but she thinks nothing of it because Santana or Bitt will answer it. She's definitely not expecting an enraged Quinn Fabray, <em>Puckerman<em>, she reminds herself, to come storming in screaming about how Rachel has always been jealous of her and to just stay out of her husbands life. By the time she's done yelling at Rachel, Quinn is breathing hard, and staring at her red in the face.

"Quinn," Rachel begins slowly, staring Quinn in the face, and watching as even more rage explodes on the blondes face. She doesn't really care though, because at the moment Rachel only has one thing on her mind; and that is to get out what she's wanted to say to Quinn since she was fifteen years old, and she tore her world apart, "you need to shut up for two seconds and listen to me. Noah Puckerman was mine first. Get that through your head. _I_ was the one he cried to when his dad left, _I_ was the one who was there for him when Beth got adopted, as a matter of fact I'm _still_ the one he talks to about anything and everything," and she knows it's petty to be pointing all of this out, and that it just lowers her to Quinn's level, but right now she doesn't care, "have you seen the way he looks at me, Quinn? He looks at me like he _should_ look at you, but he has _never_ looked at you that way; and I can promise you he never will. He married you because he thought I was going to marry Finn; he married you because he didn't think he could have his first choice," Rachel smirks, because really this feels better than it should, "deal with it," and then Quinn finds herself staring at a door, for the second time that morning.

Slowly, Rachel sinks to the floor on the other side of the door, she knows it felt good at the time, but now it doesn't feel so wonderful. She feels like shit. Swiping once more at her eyes, she stands and finishes dressing for work, walks out the front door without a word. Even if Santana's _'I've been waiting for you to say something to that bitch for ages,'_ makes her smile a little.

* * *

><p>Puck is really having issues concentrating on his work today. All he seems to be able to think about is the look of utter heartbreak on Rachel's face as Quinn tells her they want more kids. His day gets even more confusing when Rachel shows up during his lunch break. Is she here to yell at him about kissing her the other night? He isn't sure, but he definitely doesn't like the look on her face.<p>

"Your wife came to my house this morning," whatever it was that he was expecting, it definitely was not that, "so, I figured I should come here and explain what I said before you go home and she twists my words," _not that she can make them much worse,_ Rachel thinks to herself.

"Okay," Puck says, drawing out the word to make it sound like a question.

"Well, she was yelling at me, and I got angry. So I yelled back and I said some things that I'm not proud of," and that look of heart break crosses her face again, "I didn't really mean to say it all; I was just _so_ mad, Noah. I'm so sorry."

Puck shakes his head, "what do you have to be sorry about, baby?"

"I just... I don't really know how to explain it. I was just really mean, and I said that you talked to me about things, and you look at me like you should look at her... And I may have said that you only married her because you didn't think you could have me," she finishes sheepishly.

His laughter is certainly not what she thought would be coming from his mouth, "Rach, baby, someone needed to tell her the truth. Maybe that's awful and I should be yelling, but I really don't care anymore."

When she smiles at him as she's leaving, it touches her eyes for the first time since she's been back in Lima, and he couldn't be more happy about that.

* * *

><p>Her heart feels a little lighter knowing that Noah isn't mad at her, and she can't help the little skip in her step and she steps into the dance studio.<p>

* * *

><p><em>'Maybe everything will be okay,'<em> Puck thinks as he closes the shop later that day, _'just maybe.'_

**Speak Your Mind, Girl.**

**A/N -** Hope you enjoyed!


	7. Decisions, Decisions

**A/N – **It's been a long time since I've actually updated this, but I'm trying now. I've got a little bit of writers block right now, but I don't think this chapter came out too bad.

DISCLAIMER: I do not own GLEE.

* * *

><p><strong>Decisions, Decisions:<strong>

He's been thinking about it for days. Quinn will probably try to make his, and Rachel's (mostly Rachel's), lives hell; but really, they haven't even been acting like a couple. If he thinks about it, he doesn't think they've ever acted like a couple. He's almost positive that the only reason Quinn agreed to even marry him in the first place is because she didn't want to be alone.

* * *

><p>It's been a week since she's seen Noah, and it's slowly driving her insane. It's wrong to think this, she knows, but shouldn't she get a happy ending? Quinn isn't even happy with him, she doesn't think. Maybe they had a baby together, she still feels tears in her eyes every time she thinks about that, and she knows they'll be connected through Beth forever, but they don't love each other. She knows what love looks like, and it's definitely not something they have.<p>

* * *

><p>Santana is worried. She's worried that Quinn is going to do something crazy; she's worried that Rachel is gonna end up broken; and she's worried that Puck isn't gonna be able to do anything to stop any of it.<p>

"Britt Britt," Santana calls loudly, and waits for the bubbly blonde to pop her head into the living room, "I'll be back in a little bit. I have to go talk to Puck, okay?"

Brittany's face lights up as she smiles, "Okay, San. Make sure you tell him not to hurt my Rachie anymore." Santana nods and steps out of the house.

She's glad Quinn's car is gone when she pulls into the drive way, and she sighs softly as she steps out of her car.

Stepping through the door without knocking, because she's Santana and she does what she wants, she calls his name. "San," he frowns, confused, "what're you doin' here?"

"We need to talk. Or, well, I need to talk and you need to listen. Got it?" He knows better than to fight her about things when she has that determined look on her face, so he nods. "So, I don't know what the fuck you plan on doing about the whole being in love with Rachel thing," he opens his mouth to say something, but she keeps right on talking, "_but_ you need to figure it out. I don't want Rachel hurt anymore. You've hurt her enough, Puck, and she's doesn't deserve it anymore. You know why she didn't fight you about marrying Quinn? Why she stayed with Finn for so long? Do you?" Her voice raises and starts to sound a little hysterical the more she talks.

Puck lets out a growl and shakes his head, "fuck, San. No, okay? I don't know why she didn't fight! I don't know, but I wish that I had fought her."

Smiling sadly, she goes on, "she didn't fight you on any of your decisions because she didn't want to be in your way," Puck looks up at her from where he'd flopped down onto the couch, his face a mixture of shock, heartbreak, and anger.

* * *

><p>Rachel is finishing up with her first class of the day, she really does love her job, when Tyler steps through the door and she freezes. Her mind is racing as she tries to figure out what he would be doing here, but she can't think of anything.<p>

She forces a smile on her face, "hi," she says, her voice coming out a little strained, "what're you doing here?"

"I just came to see you, Rachel," he smiles, what she assumes he thinks is a charming way. It's just not the right grin, the right face.

She shakes her head, "why?"

Rachel frowns when he sighs, long and hard, "I want another chance, Rach. Please, give me another chance."

"I can't," she grimaces at the sound of her own voice, hard and not so nice, "I just can't. I'm not available."

His eyes widen is surprised anger, "you're seeing someone else?!"

She takes a step back, "lower your voice, Tyler. It's none of your business if I'm seeing someone new or not. Either way, I'm not available." She looks toward the door, and almost lets out a relieved sigh, "My next class is coming in, and you need to leave now," he glares, and with a final snarl, he's gone.

She plasters on her show smile, and greets her next class.

* * *

><p>Puck doesn't know what to do with himself anymore today. He doesn't have to go to work, but he cannot be in this house right now. After Santana's little confession of the reason Rachel let him be, she stayed for just a little while, and listened to him get out all his frustration and anger, but she left before he could fall into the sadness. It's his least favorite thing in the world. Puck <em>hates<em> being sad. He absolutely detests it, and he's been more sad lately than ever. He thinks he's made a decision about what he wants now though. He'll thank San for helping with that later. Right now, he needs to go take care of a few things.

* * *

><p>Quinn is livid about everything that happened still. How did she end up with two different doors in her face, in one morning? She's supposed to be the HBIC, and she can't even make <em>Rachel<em> upset anymore? She shows a couple of houses to a couple who are looking for their first home, but she just gets more and more angry. This couple is _sickeningly_ sweet, and she hates that. She hates that this couple is sweet and actually in love. She hates it because they have what she wants; and she knows she doesn't have it.

* * *

><p>Rachel's stepping out of her car when she gets home later that Monday evening, when Brittany comes dancing out of the house, she twirls down the porch steps, stops in front of Rachel and throws her arms around her, "hi, Rachie!"<p>

Rachel lets out a soft laugh, "Hey, Britt. How was your day?" They walk back up the stairs and into the house, where Rachel smells something delicious, while she listens to Brittany talk about what she did today.

* * *

><p>Santana leans against the doorframe to the kitchen watching her girlfriend and her best friend talk to one another. She feels a smile cross her face when Rachel lets out a genuine laugh, "alright, alright. Let's eat dinner."<p>

* * *

><p>When she steps into the kitchen Rachel grins at the table; vegan pizza. She loves pizza, it's probably one of her favorite meals, and even though San and Britt aren't vegan, she's glad they'll eat it with her. She sits down, a huge smiles on her face, "I love you guys, ya know?"<p>

Santana nods wearing a grin of her own, "'course we do, Rach. We love you, too."

While they eat, Rachel tells them about her day, tells them about Tyler and it's a surprise to Rachel, and Santana, when no one is calming San, they're calming Britt, who's yelling something about ruining Puckleberry, and killing Tyler. When she's finally calm enough for Rachel to keep telling the story, she tells them what she said, and how mad he looked; but as she looks at San and britt's faces, she knows she doesn't have to worry. They've got her, no matter what.

* * *

><p>Puck feels like he's been pacing for hours by the time Quinn finally walks through the door. Before he can say anything she's rambling about her day, and how awful it was. She's in the middle of talking about how much she hated the people she had to show houses to today, when he blurts out what he's been trying to say, what he's been thinking about, what Santana solidified the decision of by telling him about Rachel's reasoning.<p>

"Quinn, I want a divorce."

**Decisions, Decisions.**

* * *

><p><strong>AN – **I actually didn't think I was going to end it that way. I hope you enjoy though. Like I said before, I want to be proud of the story like I was with the very first chapter. I don't know about this chapter yet, but I'm definitely trying. So, if I re-write this chapter or a couple of other ones, don't be surprised.

So, I hope you enjoyed!

- Katie


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